Jaded
As I stood on the dancefloor at another drum and bass party last night an overwhelming sense of despair washed over me and I finally gave in to something I have been fighting for a long time. Jadedness.
To give a bit of a background story I have been going to raves for just on ten years running. Drum and bass is my favourite genre of electronic music – nothing else I have listened to gives me the same sense of energy and compels me to get up and dance. My group of friends has shifted slowly from parties once a month to weekly to several days in a row and back again to once every few months.
Look, this post is just a bit of a vent session so I’ll get the vitriol out of the way early – I am tired of average parties. People seem to be too drug fucked and rude. Stop asking me for pills you fucking assholes. The music at most of these parties is spun by DJs who have been to Melbourne numerous times for the most part. Its really all very samey. At this stage of the game promotors are too afraid to bring out cutting edge or slightly “underground” sounds (admittedly dnb is pretty underground as it is but whatever). I suppose it has something to do with the economic crisis, settling into a niche but for whatever reason, its happened and I don’t think its going to change. Venues are dingy places with too much red lighting everywhere (why is almost every bar in Melbourne lit in red?!).
The second facet and the most personal is that I am simply getting too old. A few years ago you could’ve taken me out to a party, watched me danced around like an idiot, go to chill out at a fellow raver’s abode and then stagger home at 2 in the afternoon. Nowadays I’m lucky if I’m out till 4:30am. Frankly this has less to do with my physical ability and more to do with changing priorities (i.e work, making the most of precious, precious daylight). Many of my friends hit this wall two years ago – this is not a bad thing.
When it comes down to it my angst stems from really not wanting to grow up. I’m in my late twenties now with a job and bills to pay and all I want is to go back and capture all those fucking fantastic moments in time. For DJ SS, Friction, DJ Hype & Black Sun Empire, Andy C, 33 & 1/3, London Elektricity, Klute, Zinc & Fresh (still in my mind one of the best times of my life) and Just Rite… I am sorry but its time to move on.
I don’t want to go.
Here’s a clip from the one of the last times I had an epic night from start to finish:
